Texts from the Babysitter

I’m not one to brag (oh who am I kidding, I LOVE to brag when it has anything to do with my daughter) but my kid is effing hilarious!  I often think about how funny it would be to document some of the crazy things she says on a daily basis but let’s face it; ain’t nobody got time for that!

Fortunately, I’ve come to realize that some of the things that my daughter says is already documented!  It’s the babysitters!!  Lucky for me, my babysitters are my mom (& dad when he is not working at sea) and my sister.  It’s a great set up that I am totally fortunate to have and I recognize how fortunate I am.  Another great thing about my babysitters is that God graced them with texting skills so I tend to get several updates throughout the day.  I began to call these updates “Lux-isms“.

My daughter is at the perfect age (3 in December) where she can talk a lot but is still innocent enough to do things, ask lots of questions and come up with ridiculous conclusions that totally make sense to her.

You know how they say laughter is the best medicine?  Well, I am convinced that toddlers are the Doctors that write those prescriptions!

I started saving some of the texts that I received over the past few days while I was slaving away at the office and here is what I have compiled so far:

Thursday, September 15, 2016, 2:32 p.m.:

Mom: “Oh by the way, Lux had a bath today.  She bent over to look at her poop and her hair got wet”.

Tuesday, September 20, 2016, 9:18 a.m.:toaster-strudel-instant-win

Mom: “I made her a toaster strudel. She liked the look of it but hated the taste.  I through it out and she got mad.  So we’re making another one for her to look at again.  Also, I gave her gum while she waits.  She can have gum right”?

Tuesday, September 27, 2016, 11:08 a.m.:

My Sister: “Lux just asked me if I ever poop! Then she says ‘well mommy poops sometimes but daddy doesn’t.  He makes lots of noises out of his bum and mouth, though.  Mommy doesn’t like it and I don’t either, auntie.  It’s smelly and stinky’ and then she gagged!! LOL”

Tuesday, September 27, 2016, 12:20 p.m.:

 My Sister: “I had to tell Lux that the baby has a penis! And she won’t stop saying it! “

 Wednesday, September 28, 2016, 12:22 p.m.:

 My Sister: “The baby had a poop and she said ‘oh sh!tty’! I asked her what that means and she said it means PEE EEEEW.  Did mom teach her that?!”

 Wednesday, September 28, 2016, 2:14 p.m.:

 My Sister: “I changed the baby again and Lux looks at me and says ‘Auntie, what’s that rope?’ dead serious! It took me several minutes to pull myself together.”

Thursday, September 28, 2016, 9:45 a.m.:

My Sister: “Lux just said ‘I think I will take my IPad with me to bed tonight.’ I asked her what time she goes to bed and she said ‘ON TIME!’ hahaha  How does she know exactly what to say?”

Thursday, September 29, 2016, 10:31 a.m.:

My Sister: “Well Lux referred to the baby’s poop this morning as “sh!tty and PEE EWW”.  She also commented on his ‘rope’.”

Thursday, September 29, 2016, 11:30 a.m.:

My Sister: “Lux just looked at me and said ‘I hear mommy drive a little too fast sometimes!  Sometimes I want to say yellow mommy, that means slow down auntie..  red means stop and green means goo bessy!  No it doesn’t, well yea it does, it just means go.'”

Thursday, September 29, 2016, 11:42 a.m.:

My Sister: “I just said Lux you are so cool and she said ya, so is daddy but sometimes he’s a little bit cold too, brrr!”

There are many, many things that my daughter can come up with in a day and sometimes I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.  But one thing is for sure; there is never a dull moment in Lux Land!  Love you baby girl! ❤ 

Feel free to share your own kid-isms!

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