Stop Telling Women They are Lucky to Have A Husband Who Isn’t Completely Useless.

One of my biggest pet peeves has always been when family and friends constantly remind me of how “lucky” I am to have a husband who actually does something useful around the house for me and who helps takes care of our daughter.

Yes, I understand that times have changed and that the husband’s place is no longer JUST at work & that the wife’s job is no longer to be JUST barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.  But nothing p!sses me off more than a husband getting praised for doing something simple and when the wife does the same thing it is expected, ignored or not recognized.

I want to be crystal clear here; I certainly appreciate the fact that my husband takes initiative and does the dishes most nights and changed our daughters bum when she was in diapers.  But what else would he do?  He is her FATHER.  He is my HUSBAND, just as I am her MOTHER and his WIFE.

If the dishes needed done and he was available, he did them!  If our daughter’s diaper needed changing, he changed it!  I don’t know about you, but my marriage is a team effort.  It is 50/50.  We help each other and raise our child together.  If you think I am “lucky” to have a husband who isn’t a selfish piece of sh!t.. Well, we should be having a completely different conversation and one that has nothing to do with me.

This is the 21st century.  Husband’s can be great and wives can be appreciated, too!

I recall one evening when my husband and I went to our friend’s home for supper.  She cooked a gigantic supper for everyone and sat the table beautifully.  Everyone ate, laughed and seemed to enjoy their meal.  She put a lot of effort into it.  When everyone was done, her husband began gathering a few dishes to put in the sink.  Immediately the older people in the group began saying “oh my you are so lucky to have a husband that does all the work for you!”

I could have went through the ceiling!

My amazing friend just spent hours out of her day to cook and serve a beautiful supper but all they saw was her husband, who’s only duty apparently should have been to eat the meal and then sit back and relax, get up and gather a handful of dishes and put them in the sink.

You know, at the end of the day my husband and I know that we are in this whole thing together but I can’t help but reserve a bit of frustration over this whole horrific topic.

People preach equality but how are we supposed to get there when it’s considered an honor to have a good husband and not a necessity?

Love you, Ian.  Thanks for being you! xx

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4 thoughts on “Stop Telling Women They are Lucky to Have A Husband Who Isn’t Completely Useless.

  1. tom says:

    I wash the dishes and every time i offer to cook my wife says no. I would like to buy the food i like and cook it if she would eat it and do the dishes. Spending several $100 a month on food might be good for my spirit too. I earned it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • momanticsblog says:

      Good for you, Tom! it sounds like you really want to be a team with your wife! Whatever works in your household, that’s great! Maybe try surprising her with supper some evening if she’s away during the day 😉 Good luck! It certainly feels good helping someone you love!

      Like

  2. stomperdad says:

    No one notices when my wife takes out the trash. When I do it there is a round of applause, praise and rewards! LOL Just kidding. This post is great. Men getting praises for doing what should be expected of them. I’m up at 6 am every morning so I can pack 3 or 4 lunches (depending on if I’m working or not). I pack my wife’s, too. I feed the kids and get them ready for school while my wife gets herself ready. It’s a team effort! GO TEAM! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • momanticsblog says:

      I love your comment because really it does go both ways! I still see my grandmother get up at 5:00 a.m. to cook a huge breakfast for my grandfather before he wakes and it is expected from him and accepted from her! It totally threw me for a loop! I suppose it’s how it always was for them, so they make a big deal out of it when my husband does anything for me or our daughter. I get it, but I don’t. haha At the end of the day, if we are happy, that’s what counts! And you’re right; GO TEAM! 😀

      Like

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