As you may or may not already know, I am a mom to one child. I have a daughter who will be turning three in December and life can get pretty damn busy as a result. Aside from being a mom, I am also a wife and I have a career that takes me outside of our home. Every day is a separate challenge with all kinds of crazy. I mean, my kid had a freezie and half a piece of gum for breakfast this morning.
I often look at parents of more than one child and wonder how they pull it off. And by “it” I mean life in general; you know, keeping everyone alive at the end of the day. It HAS to be a challenge! I totally love these parents and respect the hell out of them. You’ve heard of the term “not all super heroes wear capes“? Well, this would be the perfect example of that.
As moms and dads, we can probably all agree that when you sign on to become a parent, you are also signing on to all of these other hidden jobs as well: Doctor, taxi driver, coach, chef, referee and the list just goes on and on for infinity. I say I wouldn’t have it any other way. But OF COURSE I would. I only have one little crazy to take care of! I can sweep her up off the floor of isle 6 in 2.1 seconds and have her out of the door and buckled in the car seat like a boss and still have an extra hand to carry my sanity in! But what happens when the number of little bodies grow and you get into having 2 kids, 3, 4 or 5??!!
Lucky for me, I just so happen to have 10 nieces and nephews; 5 of which belong to my sister. Her and her husband have this awesome blended family, something that is very common in today’s society. I managed to catch her at a time where she had a couple spare minutes.. She was actually hiding in the corner eating cold Mr. Noodles before the kids noticed she was gone. It only lasted for 30 seconds, though. The oldest heard the wrapper open and the rest followed. I also noticed that she has yet to possess a grey hair on her head and only the slightest of bags under her eyes. So I pressured her into an interview (you know, in all of her “spare time”) so I could get to the bottom of this mystery. I call it “The Diary of Alisha Childs. Mom of 5, slave of the little’s“.
1. So Alisha, since I already gave a spoiler alert, we all now know that you are a mother of 5 kids in a pretty awesome blended family. I repeat, 5 kids. What are their ages?
11, 11, 9, 7 & 10 months. *Screams* “Beau! You can’t lick the plant!!” Sorry about that. Continue.
2. What was your first thought when you found out you were pregnant with your youngest (Beau)?
Oh sh!t. No, I was actually really excited. haha It was more like “holy $h!t! But in excitement. Hello! I called you from the bathroom stall at my work! Don’t you remember?!
3. Thinking back, what is the worst thing your kids have done?
Well, there is a long list. When my oldest was not quite 2, I lost her in our apartment. I couldn’t find her. I was freaking out yelling her name and she was nowhere to be found. I was in the kitchen when I felt my foot getting wet and noticed a strange liquid coming out from under the sink. “great”, I thought. Just great. I opened the cupboard and there she was… peeing herself. Potty training.. not so successful that day. BUT, I did locate my child. Hashtag parent win!
4. What do you miss the most about life before kids?
God, I had a life before kids?? I thought I was born with them! But seriously, going to the bathroom. Showering without 18 thousand kids watching me.. Like the other day, a kid that I was babysitting had a crap while I was in the shower. True story.
5. Tell a funny “my kid actually did this” story.
Beau. Beau in general. Beau tried to eat the wall this morning. End of story. He’s my wild card.
6. In 5 words, tell me a typical day in your life when you have all 5 kids at home and your husband is at work.
*exhales loudly* Is that a word?? Crying, wining, needy, poop, Kraft Dinner.. Wait, that’s six. Whatever. That’s my life, sister.
7. You’re in the grocery store with all 5 kids and your 10 month old starts screaming bloody murder. What do you do?
You mean a typical Saturday afternoon?
8. Typical breakfast items on your table on a busy Tuesday morning, and go!
Umm bacon, toast, oatmeal (but only cookies n’ cream of course), soup, Pepsi on Wednesdays, and the occasional fruit roll up. Listen, you do what you gotta do. Oh, just kidding about the Pepsi thing.. Maybe *weird wink in my direction*
9. You have two days on a desert island. All alone. What do you bring?
Oh my god yes! Okay.. So Netflix, wifi for Netflix, that wine that I like and a crap load of junk food. And I would eat it all. And I wouldn’t have to share. Ah damn, a picture of my kids, too. I caved.
So there it is. All questions asked and answered. I now understand how parents do life with multiple kids. But it wasn’t the answers Alisha gave me that made it crystal clear; it was the expression on her face the entire time she was talking to me about her kids.
I saw humor when she spoke of Beau trying to eat the wall, concern when she spoke of Makenzi going missing even for a split second, and all the love on the planet through the entire interview.
It’s no secret that every parent has their fair share of ups and downs when raising children. Whether we have 1 or 5, whether we are blended or not, we could tell a million different stories. But one thing we all have in common, no matter what, is LOVE.
Thanks for sharing a day in the life of you, sista! Love you long time! ❤